Genesis 38:1-11

I love parents. I love my parents; I love the very idea of parenthood. I love the idea of godly parents most of all. Think of a mother’s love, is that not wonderful? Think of a father’s strength and protecting role model. Godly parents are the future hope of mankind. But in spite of how much I love parents, I recognize that parents are human. Even the best of them are not perfect. They make mistakes, and they sometimes have flaws. This text illustrates one of the common flaws found in loving parents.

Judah had three sons. His first son was named Er. Judah found a wife for Er named Tamar. Er was wicked in the sight of God. This scripture does not reveal that nature of his wickedness but it does tell us that it was bad enough that God put him to death.

As was the custom and the law of that day Judah gave Er’s widow Tamar to his second son Onan to be his wife. This is unacceptable by today’s standards but at that time it was right thing to do. Onan was to help Tamar conceive a son. For legal purposes the firstborn son would be considered his brothers heir. The son would inherit Er’s share of Judah’s estate. The practical result of having a son would mean Onan’s inheritance would decrease by one third. For selfish reasons Onan did not do what was right, and God put him to death.

Two of Judah’s sons had been wicked, and they had died. At this point Judah’s parenting flaw is revealed. He does not recognize the fault was the wickedness of his sons. He blames the wife. And because he blames her he withholds his third son Shelah from her. He condemned her to live as a widow. In that culture it meant she had no rights, no income, to status and no protection. Her father loved her enough that he took her in. By custom Judah should have used her dowry to care for her; instead he left her dependent upon her father.

Judah loved his sons, but he did not love them enough to see them as they truly were. Judah could not correct his sons because he could not see their faults. True love sees our sin and loves us anyway. True love is not blind.